Day 8 - Birthday Party

Today we celebrated Talia's being in this world for a full week and after a very difficult night, she finally settled down to a stable condition and is being fed milk once again.

So many people have fallen in love with our little girl, and it was wonderful for family and friends to express this to Jan and I and Talia. Her cousins and niece made her a very impressive card and she was wearing her new headband (from Robyn) to impress the nurses.

The road ahead is still very rocky. For much of the night and morning, Talia had some sort of event occuring every 15 minutes which caused her to work against the ventilator and her vital signs dropped seriously. Whilst the doctors don't know the cause, they have increased her morpheine level which has stopped this issue, however the result has been other problems causing discomfort (which have then been resolved). Due to the complexities of Trisomy 18, nobody really knows what will occur and the responses Talia will exhibit to various treatments.

I spent many hours during the night working through the issue of when is little Talia at a point in which her body cannot go on, given the problems we are seeing. Many would say Jan and I are being unfair in keeping our precious daughter alive under these conditions, however I can say with complete honesty that I have crossed the line now and my love for Talia is the most extreme love I have ever felt. I want nothing but the best for her and finally I can begin to understand the intense love that God the Father has for each one of us.

This was my cry as I spent many hours during the night with Talia, singing and praying with her and continuing to petition Jesus to touch her body and restore her to the way He created her. No, I don't believe God created Talia with Trisomy 18 in her body to be an example, or to teach us something, etc. I believe that God created her perfect and the influence of a broken and fallen world (of which I am a part!) has allowed sickness and disease to come into being. Jesus died to bring us life, salvation and healing and wants nothing more than for sickness to be removed from each of our lives.

So why is Talia still suffering with this condition? I cannot explain why God has not yet intervened, but this will NOT stop us asking him to remove this condition from her body. The only thing which can stop us is if she is taken away or gets to a point in which she is clearly suffering - even then, we will keep asking God to intervene, because we know with absolute certainty that He can bring about this miracle.

My simplistic perspective is that God can heal anything at any time, without the person's faith being an issue to Him. However, He seeks to partner with us and faith moves God to action. Genuine persistence brings about a response from God and this is what we desire.

We love this little girl so much and sitting with her, just holding her beatiful little foot (as I love to do) is enough for now.