Day 7 - Faith Tested to Extremes

Can you imagine watching helplessly while your child almost suffocates to death, unable to do anything but cry out to God in anguish. This was Jan and I tonight on two occassions so far - it will be a long, long night!

Talia had some episodes in the previous night with blood in her lungs, and they have now managed to change the settings on the ventilator to equalise the pressure somewhat (reducing the risk of bleeding, which is related to the heart condition), however it seems that the blood remaining in her lungs is blocking the ventilator regularly until it clears out.

It would be easy if this was the main problem, but it is merely a symptom of the condition and the bigger decisions now come closer to us. Who are we to make life and death decisions for another human being, and yet we are required to do so.

Would Talia be best left to suffer breathing or heart failure without resucitation, since her body is struggling to cope with the difficulties of breathing, etc? Should she undergo a heart operation which will alleviate some of the problems but not solve them? The risks are high and we hate to see our precious baby in any pain or discomfort - how can we know what choices to make?

This is the time to hear from God clearly if there ever was a time.

Today also contained a number of joyful moments. There was time for Jan to hold Talia for a couple of hours on her lap which was very moving.

Catherine's 2 year old daughter, Poppy was smuggled into the NICU and desperately wanted to pray for Talia, which was an amazing blessing to us.

The pure faith of a child is beautiful, since they understand the love of their parents and of Jesus who loves them even more. The trust that Jesus will look after Talia and the expectation of His healing power was a great example to us.

I spent much of the night praying with Talia and singing to her. She is peaceful again and tomorrow I hear that our "miracle team" want to recognise her first week with a birthday celebration. I'm not so good at celebration, so this is another blessing to us in having such friends and family. Yesterday we were all able to cry together and tomorrow we will look at the joy little Talia is bringing to so many!